Post by El Chingar on Jul 7, 2020 3:18:30 GMT -5
The following events take place the day after PrimeTime VII
Redondo California
A maroon 1951 Chevy Fleetline is driving through a neighborhood. In the back seat sits El Chingar, taking huge puffs out of his cigar with dark glasses shielding his eyes. In the front sits his masked assistant and client Ernesto who now fully, and reluctantly, has adopted the name El Gordo.
El Gordo
Where are we going
(hacking through all the smoke)
and can you roll down the window please? You know I have asthma, why are you doing this?
El Chingar rolls his eyes and gives his window the tiniest crack to let the smoke slowly slip out.
El Chingar
I told you
(taking another puff of the cigar)
We're going to see a friend of mine.
El Gordo
What's with you and all these secrets now? Gah-lee, you become a wrestler and now you think your
(in a high pitch mocking voice)
meester beeg-shot
Chingar wacks Gordo on the back of the head, he lets out a yelp.
El Chingar
Correction, you're a wrestler now. I'm your manager. And it's like I said, everything is on a need to know basis now. And you don't need-to-know. But what I can tell you, we're going to do some training. You're facing a couple of locos in your first match. If you want to beat some locos, you have to get into the mind of a loco, and there is no one better to train you than the craziest man I know. His name is Creeper, and his house is coming up.
They continue to drive through the neighborhood zig-zagging through the streets. Each turn the houses look more warn down, and more menacing than the last. They pull into a dead end, with a singular house. The yard is dead, and drying even more in the bright son. Gordo parks the car, gets out and makes his way to the house, behind him Chingar has rolled down the window and whistled at him. He turns around and walks back to the car, giving out an audible sigh as he opens his door. The two walk up to the house and knock on it, as tiny dogs are heard barking inside. An old woman opens the door, kicking the tiny dogs away.
Woman
Hola? Who are you? What do you want?
El Chingar
Hi, is
(leaning in and whispering)
is Creeper home?
The woman squints at El Chingar, she leans in to get a better look.
Woman
Joey? Little Joey is that you?
El Chingar
Yes Miss Guiterrez..but it's El Chingar now! Please, I just need to see Creeper.
Woman
(leaning back into the house)
OSCAR! Your friend is here for you!
Creeper
(From a distance)
I'm in the yard with the guys!
The woman let's them in the house. The two make their way to the backyard. Several tall hispanic men are hanging out in the yard drinking and chatting with a faint hint of music. A few bikes are parked in the center of the yard, all of them chrome with raised handle bars. El Chingar and Gordo walk into the yard as the men stare at them. From out of the bushes comes a skinny Mexican man, with long kaki shorts, socks up to his knees, and a white tank top. He whistles at Chingar as the two embrace. He looks Gordo up and down. Gordo goes in for an embrace but the man sidesteps him.
Creeper
Yo, Joseph! Sorry sorry..El Chingar! What brings you here?
El Chingar
We came out here to train with you. Gordo over there has a fight coming up against some crazy irish fuck.
Creeper
Oh thas right thas right. You do that greased up man grab stuff now. Well, you came to the right place! I'm actually about to start a session right now.
Creeper claps his hands leaving Chingar confused, as he heads to the middle of the yard.
Creeper
Alright alright, listen up. Break time is over, time to get back to the session.
All the men lining the yard stop what they're doing. They form a circle around Creeper as Chingar and Gordo watch on.
Creeper
Alright now, at starting position. You're going to pivot your left foot at a ninety degree angle, with your right foot forward. You're going to slowly go down, like you're always down for your homies since day one.
The group led by Creeper slowly go down, as he lets out a a long whistle going an octave down. After a pause they all go back up as Creeper lets out a whistle an octave up.
Creeper
Good, good! Next up, grab your weights. The five pounds, we don't want you guys pulling a muscle in your trigger arms. We're going to put your fists together and elbows up. Now you're going to lean to the left (the group all lean) and lean to the right (the group continues). Remember to keep your chins up, you can't feel the power unless you feel the burn!
Chingar breaks through the group, stopping Creeper mid lean.
El Chingar
What the fuck is this? I thought you were legit?
Creeper
I am legit! I've left that life behind, and now I'm bringing the homies inner peace.
El Chingar
Inner peace? Ta loca inner peace! We have a fight coming up, and we came to prepare. I thought you were the homie Creeper?
Creeper drops his weights, as everybody stops to stare at Chingar.
Creeper
Hey! Don't you ever question my love for the homies! That's why I'm out here.
(Creeper calms down and picks his weights back up)
Ever since the doc diagnosed me with a hyper thigh...(pausing to think on how to pronounce the word)
Hypo-thermi-,hypo-tham, hypo...I got a neck thing. Ever since I was diagnosed, I realized life was too short, and I need to do what I can for my community.
Just give it a try, I think you'll be surprised by the results.
El Chingar
Fine!
(He whistles over at Gordo who waddles over to join the group)
Creeper
Alright, everybody on your bikes!
(the group and Gordo all get on a bike)
For this next one we're going to work on inner peace. Because through inner peace you're going to find inner strength, and that inner strength will turn into..outer...strength
The group start pedaling as Creeper walks back and forth surveying them.
Creeper
Nice and slow. Just a little warmup. You're cruising through the hood on a nice sunny day. Oh no! Your tia's Chihuahua got out and it's chasing you, pedal a little faster.
(the group speeds up)
Good, nice and easy. You're on the way to the homies sisters quinceanera, think clam thoughts, think how you're going to approach your homies cousin with the weird tooth. Oh no, your homie calls you and tells you he's out of beer.
Creeper walks to each biker and hands them a six pack of Modelo. He hands one to Gordo who fumbles it almost dropping it.
Creeper
Alright, now, you're going to slowly breath in and breath out. When you breath out I want you to put the modelo on your shoulder, working both your cardio and your upper body strength.
The group follows the instructions. Before he can get the beer to his shoulder, Chingar grabs Gordo off the bike.
El Chingar
No, we're done! I need an actual trainer. A real O.G.
Creeper
I'm disappointed. I thought you were open minded, but I guess not. Lucky for you I love the homies, so I do have somebody you can call. His name..
(whispering in Chingar's ear)
Poco Suerte
The homies let out a gasp at the sound of that name. A quiet "Poco Suerte?" is heard from afar as everybody is staring, and the scene fades out.
Toluca Lake, Los Angeles, California
Chingar and Gordo pull up to a semi nice house in a gated community. They walk up to the door and ring the doorbell. A large man opens the door, towering over the two. He stands there in silence
El Chingar
Uh yeah...I'm here to see..Poco Suerte?
The man steps back allowing the two entry. As they walk into the room, there are many men hanging out on couches and half broken furniture, counting money and other things. Smoke fills the air as Gordo starts coughing. They approach the end of the room where an older man with a long beard and an all black suit is sitting.
El Chingar
Ah yes...Poco...Poco Suerte?
Gordo coughs some more
El Chingar
(nudging Gordo)Shhhh. Hold it in if you have to!
The man in the suit whistles, as a door behind him is opened, then closed. They don't see anybody walk out. From behind the sitting men shuffles out a tubby four foot-five inch man. He has on kaki shorts that go to his feet. A white wife beater and a black cargo jacket over it, a floral print bandana around his head, and a crudely cut in tear drop carving on his face. The main in the suit gets up, giving him his seat.
Poco Suerte
(sniffs)
Ay, what you want foo?
El Chingar
Ah yes, we're here..humbly! We are here before you, in hopes of learning the ways of-
(Leaning in giving Poco Suerte before)
I feel like I've seen you before...aren't you..
El Gordo
(Interjecting)
It's the Leprechaun from the wrestling show!
Poco Suerte
Hey! I don't do that anymore!
El Chingar
Oh dude, I didn't know you can talk? Hey where is your shillelagh?
Poco Suerte jumps up pulling out a butterfly knife and spins it around
Poco Suerte
You wanna get stuck foo!
El Chingar
(taking a step back)
No no no no! We don't want any trouble. We just want to learn how to fight like a crazy person. We'll even pay you!
Suerte puts his knife away and sits back down.
Poco Suerte
Well why didn't you say so! Alright, I'll train you. Your first lesson is...A SURPRISE ATTACK!
All the men jump on Gordo and Chingar as the scene fades out
Redondo California
A maroon 1951 Chevy Fleetline is driving through a neighborhood. In the back seat sits El Chingar, taking huge puffs out of his cigar with dark glasses shielding his eyes. In the front sits his masked assistant and client Ernesto who now fully, and reluctantly, has adopted the name El Gordo.
El Gordo
Where are we going
(hacking through all the smoke)
and can you roll down the window please? You know I have asthma, why are you doing this?
El Chingar rolls his eyes and gives his window the tiniest crack to let the smoke slowly slip out.
El Chingar
I told you
(taking another puff of the cigar)
We're going to see a friend of mine.
El Gordo
What's with you and all these secrets now? Gah-lee, you become a wrestler and now you think your
(in a high pitch mocking voice)
meester beeg-shot
Chingar wacks Gordo on the back of the head, he lets out a yelp.
El Chingar
Correction, you're a wrestler now. I'm your manager. And it's like I said, everything is on a need to know basis now. And you don't need-to-know. But what I can tell you, we're going to do some training. You're facing a couple of locos in your first match. If you want to beat some locos, you have to get into the mind of a loco, and there is no one better to train you than the craziest man I know. His name is Creeper, and his house is coming up.
They continue to drive through the neighborhood zig-zagging through the streets. Each turn the houses look more warn down, and more menacing than the last. They pull into a dead end, with a singular house. The yard is dead, and drying even more in the bright son. Gordo parks the car, gets out and makes his way to the house, behind him Chingar has rolled down the window and whistled at him. He turns around and walks back to the car, giving out an audible sigh as he opens his door. The two walk up to the house and knock on it, as tiny dogs are heard barking inside. An old woman opens the door, kicking the tiny dogs away.
Woman
Hola? Who are you? What do you want?
El Chingar
Hi, is
(leaning in and whispering)
is Creeper home?
The woman squints at El Chingar, she leans in to get a better look.
Woman
Joey? Little Joey is that you?
El Chingar
Yes Miss Guiterrez..but it's El Chingar now! Please, I just need to see Creeper.
Woman
(leaning back into the house)
OSCAR! Your friend is here for you!
Creeper
(From a distance)
I'm in the yard with the guys!
The woman let's them in the house. The two make their way to the backyard. Several tall hispanic men are hanging out in the yard drinking and chatting with a faint hint of music. A few bikes are parked in the center of the yard, all of them chrome with raised handle bars. El Chingar and Gordo walk into the yard as the men stare at them. From out of the bushes comes a skinny Mexican man, with long kaki shorts, socks up to his knees, and a white tank top. He whistles at Chingar as the two embrace. He looks Gordo up and down. Gordo goes in for an embrace but the man sidesteps him.
Creeper
Yo, Joseph! Sorry sorry..El Chingar! What brings you here?
El Chingar
We came out here to train with you. Gordo over there has a fight coming up against some crazy irish fuck.
Creeper
Oh thas right thas right. You do that greased up man grab stuff now. Well, you came to the right place! I'm actually about to start a session right now.
Creeper claps his hands leaving Chingar confused, as he heads to the middle of the yard.
Creeper
Alright alright, listen up. Break time is over, time to get back to the session.
All the men lining the yard stop what they're doing. They form a circle around Creeper as Chingar and Gordo watch on.
Creeper
Alright now, at starting position. You're going to pivot your left foot at a ninety degree angle, with your right foot forward. You're going to slowly go down, like you're always down for your homies since day one.
The group led by Creeper slowly go down, as he lets out a a long whistle going an octave down. After a pause they all go back up as Creeper lets out a whistle an octave up.
Creeper
Good, good! Next up, grab your weights. The five pounds, we don't want you guys pulling a muscle in your trigger arms. We're going to put your fists together and elbows up. Now you're going to lean to the left (the group all lean) and lean to the right (the group continues). Remember to keep your chins up, you can't feel the power unless you feel the burn!
Chingar breaks through the group, stopping Creeper mid lean.
El Chingar
What the fuck is this? I thought you were legit?
Creeper
I am legit! I've left that life behind, and now I'm bringing the homies inner peace.
El Chingar
Inner peace? Ta loca inner peace! We have a fight coming up, and we came to prepare. I thought you were the homie Creeper?
Creeper drops his weights, as everybody stops to stare at Chingar.
Creeper
Hey! Don't you ever question my love for the homies! That's why I'm out here.
(Creeper calms down and picks his weights back up)
Ever since the doc diagnosed me with a hyper thigh...(pausing to think on how to pronounce the word)
Hypo-thermi-,hypo-tham, hypo...I got a neck thing. Ever since I was diagnosed, I realized life was too short, and I need to do what I can for my community.
Just give it a try, I think you'll be surprised by the results.
El Chingar
Fine!
(He whistles over at Gordo who waddles over to join the group)
Creeper
Alright, everybody on your bikes!
(the group and Gordo all get on a bike)
For this next one we're going to work on inner peace. Because through inner peace you're going to find inner strength, and that inner strength will turn into..outer...strength
The group start pedaling as Creeper walks back and forth surveying them.
Creeper
Nice and slow. Just a little warmup. You're cruising through the hood on a nice sunny day. Oh no! Your tia's Chihuahua got out and it's chasing you, pedal a little faster.
(the group speeds up)
Good, nice and easy. You're on the way to the homies sisters quinceanera, think clam thoughts, think how you're going to approach your homies cousin with the weird tooth. Oh no, your homie calls you and tells you he's out of beer.
Creeper walks to each biker and hands them a six pack of Modelo. He hands one to Gordo who fumbles it almost dropping it.
Creeper
Alright, now, you're going to slowly breath in and breath out. When you breath out I want you to put the modelo on your shoulder, working both your cardio and your upper body strength.
The group follows the instructions. Before he can get the beer to his shoulder, Chingar grabs Gordo off the bike.
El Chingar
No, we're done! I need an actual trainer. A real O.G.
Creeper
I'm disappointed. I thought you were open minded, but I guess not. Lucky for you I love the homies, so I do have somebody you can call. His name..
(whispering in Chingar's ear)
Poco Suerte
The homies let out a gasp at the sound of that name. A quiet "Poco Suerte?" is heard from afar as everybody is staring, and the scene fades out.
Toluca Lake, Los Angeles, California
Chingar and Gordo pull up to a semi nice house in a gated community. They walk up to the door and ring the doorbell. A large man opens the door, towering over the two. He stands there in silence
El Chingar
Uh yeah...I'm here to see..Poco Suerte?
The man steps back allowing the two entry. As they walk into the room, there are many men hanging out on couches and half broken furniture, counting money and other things. Smoke fills the air as Gordo starts coughing. They approach the end of the room where an older man with a long beard and an all black suit is sitting.
El Chingar
Ah yes...Poco...Poco Suerte?
Gordo coughs some more
El Chingar
(nudging Gordo)Shhhh. Hold it in if you have to!
The man in the suit whistles, as a door behind him is opened, then closed. They don't see anybody walk out. From behind the sitting men shuffles out a tubby four foot-five inch man. He has on kaki shorts that go to his feet. A white wife beater and a black cargo jacket over it, a floral print bandana around his head, and a crudely cut in tear drop carving on his face. The main in the suit gets up, giving him his seat.
Poco Suerte
(sniffs)
Ay, what you want foo?
El Chingar
Ah yes, we're here..humbly! We are here before you, in hopes of learning the ways of-
(Leaning in giving Poco Suerte before)
I feel like I've seen you before...aren't you..
El Gordo
(Interjecting)
It's the Leprechaun from the wrestling show!
Poco Suerte
Hey! I don't do that anymore!
El Chingar
Oh dude, I didn't know you can talk? Hey where is your shillelagh?
Poco Suerte jumps up pulling out a butterfly knife and spins it around
Poco Suerte
You wanna get stuck foo!
El Chingar
(taking a step back)
No no no no! We don't want any trouble. We just want to learn how to fight like a crazy person. We'll even pay you!
Suerte puts his knife away and sits back down.
Poco Suerte
Well why didn't you say so! Alright, I'll train you. Your first lesson is...A SURPRISE ATTACK!
All the men jump on Gordo and Chingar as the scene fades out